Seth Megow was 29 and has been married for 10 years by then when he discovered the affairs his wife, Crissy, had been having. His world went crumbling down and he felt a wreck seeing the closest person he ever had broke his trust. The couple married young, when they were 19, and went to college together.
It was a life of pure bliss for Seth.
“We fell in love, worked our way through college together, went on adventures, volunteered in the community side by side, had four beautiful kids, bought a home together, had an extremely healthy physical intimacy, counselled other young married couples and supported each other’s dreams.
“When I say there was a lot of trusts, I’m underselling it.”
Seth and Crissy would often give advice to other young couples.
Seth comes from Georgia, USA, and pointed out that he had his suspicions for 2 years before he found out. The first 8 years were beautiful.
But after that, Seth began to notice the small changes his wife was making. At that point, Seth reasoned with himself, denying that his wife might be cheating: it could be the stress that makes her avoid things.
“We were still going strong. In my mind, I figured it was just the stress of work, raising four kids, or our new home that was giving me these flickers of concern."
She began to act suspicious.
Crissy changed the passwords to her social media account, paid things in cash most of the time and stayed out late till night. There are even nights when she wouldn't come home during the last two years of their marriage.
At the time, Seth and Crissy have four children, Stevie, Neela, Titus, and Olive. Seth thought it was taking care of the kids and the whole moving into the new house thing that makes her so avoiding.
“Now to be fair, she had been an amazing mother for a long time."
Seth could start physically confirm that something was wrong, but he waited.
“It’s easy to say looking back that I should have just let her go then.
“But at that point, I still had some trust left in her.
“If she said she wasn’t having an affair, then she wasn’t.”
The truth came out to Seth and it marked the end of their marriage.
One day, he found Crissy who forgot to log out of her Facebook and started sniffing around. Seth found messages she had with men he doesn't know. She had been having one night stands and even had a long-term boyfriend.
“She shared much more than her body… she shared her heart. That’s what hurts the most about affairs.”
Seth recalls all the trust, energy and encouragement they have both poured for each other. He especially felt hurt when reminded of the things he's done for her.
Now, a happier single dad to four kids, Seth still lets Crissy come to visit every weekend.
“I was the one who stayed up late helping her with her college coursework because she struggled with math.
“It was me who woke up in the middle of the night, placed the babies at her breast to eat then burping them and changing their diaper so she could sleep.
“I’m the one would worked in a burning hot warehouse loading trucks to support the family, so she could finish her Master’s Degree."
She got the divorce and "freedom" that she wanted while Seth gets the custody to the four kids. She'd visit them every other weekend.